迷 乐

     我是真的生病了，心理和身体。

     十月是劳累奔波的一个月，因为我发现我坐公交的时间比上课的时间还多。从十一一开始带着别人武汉两日游，到10月5号的一个人徒步去汉口，再到退林肯公园演唱会门票、公司开会，还有就是最后连续8天的兼职工作，这一连串的事直接导致我现在对人群恐惧。现在一看到人多就心情烦躁，胸闷气短，严重时还有可能晕倒。17号在VOX看JOYSIDE演出的时候，我都已经从那些躁动的人们中撤出来了，还是不舒服，看一个美女在打台球，可惜她的技术和她的长相反差太大，一杆出去，我差点昏厥过去。最后，只好从VOX里面出来，在门口坐了半个小时才好。还有去食堂、超市都会有这样的状况。我讨厌人多的地方，讨厌公交车，也很厌倦武汉话，整天整天的戴着MP3！

     朋友说我心理出了问题，要注意了，小心得抑郁症和自闭症。应该没那么严重吧！我想我只是累了，只想找个没人的地方，不用说话，也不需要听别人说，好好休息。马不停蹄，牛要歇息。休养生息，好好学习！珍爱生命，远离人群！

     也许10月没过完是不可能消停的。就在这个月的最后一天，我生病了，一觉醒来发烧了。发烧，好像是小学二年级以前的事了吧，现在怎么可能！而且我一向认为自己是身强体壮，工作起来一次搬两件酒都没问题的人，居然会发烧！！唉！也许是9月以来各种心理上的打击加上10月的奔波导致抵抗力下降了吧，真是岁月的蹉跎啊！

     11月要开始了，又要有好多事要做。就让它自然的来吧，就让它悄然的去吧。看我到底能承受到什么程度！

              现在的心情就如田原的这首歌.           

                                            《Fragile Inside》

Don't open the door.
Don't let the sun ray in.
It will burn my heart.
It will burn my heart.

Lie on the floor.
I did it a lot.
My head stuck to the wall.
I can't get it off.

Turn on the radio the talk shows are going on and on...
We are living in this blank area
and we will fit it up.

My head has been crashed
by all that I saw
They did really hurt me.
Oh they really hurt me.

I admitted all my lies
that I've told you for a thousand times.
Sometimes we just can't go blind
for we are all fragile inside.

Don't close the door.
Don't be scared of what you saw.
The world is like it used to be.
Nobody could change it.

Turn on the radio the talk shows are going on and on...
We are living in this blank area
and we will fit it up.

I admitted all my lies
that I've told you for a thousand times.
Sometimes we just can't go blind
for we are all fragile inside